St Joseph a model for working husbands and fathers

St Joseph, A Model for Working Husbands and Fathers

As the Church celebrates the feast of Saint Joseph the Worker on May 1, it is an excellent reminder that he was just an ordinary man, husband and father. St Joseph was a carpenter who earned an honest living to provide for his family. From him, Jesus learned the value, dignity and joy of what it means to eat bread that is the fruit of one’s labour. St Joseph was a husband to Mary and was at her side in good times and bad – on the journey to Bethlehem for the census, in the hours when she gave birth in a stable, and amid the drama of the flight to Egypt. He was an exemplary father in presenting Jesus at the temple and fulfilling the Jewish custom, and later in his daily life at home and in the workshop in Nazareth where he taught his trade to Jesus.

Indeed, St Joseph shows all fathers that it is possible to be faithful and to say ‘yes’ to God’s call in all circumstances. In today’s world, fathers often share the burden of excelling at work to provide for the family and balancing faith and family life. Two Catholic fathers share their stories on how they, like St Joseph, learnt to be open to the signs of God’s presence and receptive to His plans, and not simply to their own.

Ordering his time

Mervyn and his family. Photo: Mervyn Loh.

After starting his own business, Mervyn’s relationship with God and family took a backseat. “I was a Sunday Catholic who did not place importance on my spiritual life. Instead, I would justify that my relationship with God was personal and made the excuse that attending Mass was optional,” said the father of three and a parishioner at the Church of Divine Mercy.

Mervyn started his business just weeks before his wife Ashley was due to deliver their first child Caitlyn. “We were having a baby, but my business was also my baby, so even after Caitlyn was born, I was more committed to work, which many times resulted in working throughout the day and into the wee hours of the morning, and found myself neglecting to spend time with my family,” he said.

The couple experienced the pain of miscarriage six times between 2013 and 2019. After the first, they both had time to grieve together. However, circumstances were different after both Caitlyn and the business was born.

Shared Mervyn, “During the difficult time we would grieve together at first; but I found myself quickly attending to business responsibilities as a necessity, forgoing concern and consideration about Ashley’s healing.”

Only after attending the Conversion Experience Retreat (CER) at the Catholic Spirituality Centre with Ashley were they both overcome with grace. Mervyn began to listen to God and, like St Joseph, became more attuned to his family’s needs and sensitivities. Mervyn began to be more aware of God’s call and to fulfil his vocation as a good worker, husband, and father. He consciously sets time aside for his family and began involving himself in church ministry again.

Family first

Joshua and his family on their way to a family outing. Photo: Joshua Norsen.

Joshua Norsen, an adult convert to Catholicism and a parishioner at the Church of St Mary of the Angels said he always prioritises his wife and two children always. “If my boss asks me to choose between work and family, it will always be family. I strive to be an exemplary worker, but family will always come first,” he said. “Both my kids are still very young, so Richelle and I try to set aside a day a week where we have an outing with them after school. When I reflect on the life of St Joseph, I think of how he always said ‘yes’ to God, even though he had nothing to gain from it or did not understand. He had faith in God – that’s how I try to live my life.”

In the future, Joshua hopes that his children would learn from St Joseph the Worker how to be a good Christian worker. “I pray that they will be charitable to their colleagues, be firm and responsible for their work, let God guide them as they carry out their tasks and be kind to all always.”

An expression of love

The life of St Joseph and the testimonies of Mervyn and Joshua show us that when we put God first and direct all our work (at home or in the office) toward holiness and salvation, it becomes an expression of love for the family. By extension, by living out our duties as workers, fathers and husbands, we express our service and gratitude to God and one another.

Contributed by Catholic Engaged Encounter, an affiliate of Catholic Family Life. Mervyn and Joshua volunteer at CEE and help young couples discern marriage. The international marriage preparation programme prepares couples for the Sacrament of Marriage.